Sometimes I sit back and think long & hard about the interactions I have with people. Today is one of those days where a good friend and I didn't agree because she asked my opinion and then didn't like the response. I get so tired of being used as a sounding board. I find it exhausting that so often she lashes out at me because she is unhappy only to have to come back later and apologize. I get so tired of the apologies.
I am in such a good place now. I've been taking care of myself. I've been doing yoga, massages, eating better food, spending time with people that nourish me, talking with my husband, and sending good energy out into the world. I am boggled as to why I feed into this negative behavior time and time again, why I listen to the banter time & time again.
I am doing everything in my power to figure out why I am overweight. I am working "behind the scenes" to name the characters in my life that I use to protect myself. I have looked at pictures of myself growing up and realized that I blossomed into a woman much earlier than I should have and I have never taken the time to celebrate that. I've never really been proud that I am a woman. **This is an entire entry in its own right, but I am working with it right now** I am working hard to be the person I want to be. I think it is time that I figure out who needs to be part of that journey. I wouldn't stay in a bad marriage, why do I stay in a bad friendship?
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